Shop More Submit  Join Login

:iconstarija:
so, i read this two days ago. sorry for the late comment!

"He sat in the back of the armored hummer provided by S.H.I.E.L.D, ignoring the trace blonde hairs that fell around his face. In a way, he hoped they hid his indecision."

i loved the way you made that little metaphorical/figurative use of his hair to hide his indecision. that little start got me hooked from beginning to end. you wrote this story in both a clever and cute fashion. i ship Thorki as well, ya know, but obviously you knew that since i mentioned it in my big list of pairings.. lol

anyway! i loved the brothers' interaction, and the emotional displays leading to an affectionate kiss while keeping them in character. the detail and description wasn't so bad either. so sweet~
The Artist thought this was FAIR
2 out of 2 deviants thought this was fair.

Comments


:iconofonesoul:
OfOneSoul Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you so much for the critique, my dear! :huggle:

And I am very glad that you thought I kept them in character! That was the hardest part, I think - making sure that I didn't destroy the original characters and their perpetual awesomeness. ^^;

BTW - Merry Christmas, again! :iconrubcheeksplz:

:heart: *OfOneSoul
Reply
:iconstarija:
Starija Featured By Owner Jan 6, 2013  Student Writer
merry Christmas! you did anything for it? my family and i don't celebrate holidays, sooo just in case you were going to ask. lol
Reply
:iconofonesoul:
OfOneSoul Featured By Owner Jan 8, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Oh noes, no Christmas? :faint: My boyfriend and I went to my mother's, his mother's & my father's... & I got a laptop from my boyfriend. That's pretty much it. ^^;
Reply
:iconstarija:
Starija Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2013  Student Writer
lol nope. if i get married and have children, i'll definitely celebrate ALL holidays though! heheh so boring not celebrating them! i'm so American.
SO HOW LONG HAVE YOU TWO BEEN TOGETHER HUH HUH /nudge nudge
Reply
:iconofonesoul:
OfOneSoul Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
A year & 8 months now! :iconlachoirplz: He just got a job as a police officer & we're getting our first house! :nuu:
Reply
:iconstarija:
Starija Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2013  Student Writer
sorry for the late reply! been lazy. lol BUT THAT'S COOL~ you guys are doing splendidly still right? hope you have a good time together in the future~
Reply
:iconofonesoul:
OfOneSoul Featured By Owner Jan 24, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you, sweetheart! :huggle:
Reply
Add a Comment: